


But He Didn't

by aerographer (Aerographer)



Series: Anxiety [1]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: M/M, bumped up the rating bc mild smut in the second chapter, im so sorry, this is what i write at two in the morning when im drowning in my sadness, will is so sad guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-06
Updated: 2015-07-12
Packaged: 2018-04-08 00:41:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4284114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aerographer/pseuds/aerographer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will Solace was eleven years old when a small boy with black hair and a bomber jacket walked into camp.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got his idea and I just had to write it because sad Will is something I need

Will Solace was eleven years old when a small boy with black hair and a bomber jacket walked into camp.

Will had been living in the Hermes cabin at the time, as he had yet to be claimed. He'd heard the loud sound of something big hitting the canoe lake and he along with many other campers went to go investigate. He picked his way through the roots of trees and thick shrubs to the lake and almost couldn't believe what he was seeing. There was a school bus partially submerged in the water. A few campers he didn’t recognize were pulling themselves out of the bus and they were followed by a large group of girls in silver clothes. The small boy seemed to be enamored by a kid a few years older than him. The Percy Jackson kid. The one who saved the camp two whole times. Will didn't know why, but a sharp stab of pain went through his chest and he wished he could be the one talking to the boy.

Will followed the boy from a distance and he could tell that he was shooting rapid questions with an expression of fascination smudged across his thin features. He wanted to talk to the kid. He wanted to be friends with him. Eventually, Will pushed the black haired child from his mind and forced himself to go on with his normal activities. He went to the archery range and was adequate as usual. He went to the climbing wall and only got two burns on his arms. He went to mythology studies and his focus wavered as it always did. At dinner Will sat squished between two other unclaimed kids and forced himself to not look at the boy who stared glumly at his food. At the camp fire, he was claimed by Apollo and he tried to be excited but mostly he was just sad because he wouldn't get to talk to the raven haired boy that had arrived earlier.

When Percy Jackson and Thalia Grace and the Hunters of Artemis went off on their quest, the dark haired boy wandered around by himself. Connor and Travis Stoll had taken him under their wing and were showing him the ropes. Will found himself distracted when the three would walk by an area where he was. He was extra mediocre at archery that day. He didn't notice Lee Fletcher watching him with a sympathetic look on his face, Later that night, Will's older brother, Lee Fletcher, looked at him and said, "Choose carefully." Will didn't know what he meant by that, but promised he would none the less. Lee had smiled sadly at him and Will _didn't understand_.

Will could have reflected what his brother told him. But he didn't.

\---

Will was eleven years old when a **(gorgeous)** boy with dark hair and a bulky jacket fled from camp leaving a blazing trail of hatred and anger in his wake.

\---

Will was twelve years old when his world came to a screeching halt.

Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood, and Tyson Jackson dove into the Labyrinth without a second glance. Part of Will was jealous. Why couldn’t he go on a quest? A small part of him wanted to be the hero of the camp, to be the one to save the day, but that small part was often consumed by his pounding heart, nervous stomach, and sweaty hands. He couldn’t deal with being the center of attention. It just wasn’t in his personality. His fear ruled over him too much for him to ever be able to do something so forward as _lead_. So he stayed back. He began helping his brothers, Lee and Michael, in the infirmary. He helped with demigods who came in with minor injuries like a burn or a sprain. He did little things, like bring his brothers food or putting away bandages and medicines. The infirmary was where he found himself wanting to be. He wanted to help people.

Percy Jackson went missing in the Labyrinth and Will was _ashamed_ at the speck inside him that was _glad_ that the teenager had been blown into the heavens. Annabeth Chase, however, was a complete wreck. Her hair was dirty and her eyes were bloodshot. She must have been crying a lot because she sometimes would hold her stomach in pain. Her eyes were dead. Will wondered if that was what it meant to be heartbroken. He asked Lee about it later, after dinner but before bed. He’d smiled down at Will and said yes. He told Will that he hopefully would never have to deal with it because it was a horrible, horrible feeling. He didn’t want to experience it if Annabeth was anything to go by. Sometimes his hands shook and he would get lost in his fear, but at least he wasn’t heartbroken **(he was)**.

Percy Jackson returned just after his shard had been burned. Annabeth practically tackled him in a hug before she pulled back and looked at him with watery eyes. They had a small exchange before Percy came back and faced the camp. Everyone was so happy to see him and Chiron made a speech that night a dinner. The next day though, the pair descended back into the Labyrinth. The camp fell back into its usual routine except they were setting up defenses by Zeus’ Fist **(he didn't want a war because a war meant that people would die and he didn't want anyone to die he didn't know if he could handle seeing his friends dead)**. Will still helped his brothers in the infirmary. Michael and Lee were the closest thing to family that he had and they always looked out for him. Will was happy. His fear and worries had temporarily faded from his mind. But then the four emerged from the Labyrinth with a full army on their tails. There was a fifth person but Will couldn’t see them very well. Everything descended into chaos quite quickly after that. Lee decided that they needed all the help they could get and told Will to get his bow and quiver before stationing him in a tree near the entrance to the Labyrinth.

Will shot down monster after monster without a thought. Suddenly Lee’s voice rang out loud and clear. “Defend!” He shouted from his post. Will’s eyes scanned the area before landing on a boy with dark hair and a bulky jacket. He felt like a weight had been taken off his chest and it was because of the boy who’d fled the camp the year before who was full of rage and pain. He chose the boy as his hero and shot down enemies that turned in his direction. Will was almost knocked out of his tree when the boy summoned a horde of skeletons with a scream. They launched themselves at his attackers and the boy fell to the ground with shadows curling off of his thin body. His heart almost stopped. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t tear his eyes off of this child who’d torn apart the ground and raised the dead. Will saw someone rush to his side and call his name. “Nico?? Nico oh my gods are you ok??” Nico. The name would later roll around in his brain and keep him up for several nights. He wanted to go to his aide, to help him, but he couldn’t. He was still paralyzed in his tree. Blood roared in his ears. Will remembered that he was fighting in a war and shook himself back into shape. He fired arrow after arrow while never taking his eyes off the boy who laid face down on the forest floor.

Soon though, the battle was over. And that was when things went horribly wrong in Will’s world. Lee had died. He almost couldn’t believe it. And from the looks on the other kids faces, neither could they. Later that night, while he layed in bed, Will finally let himself cry. He trembled and cried and he couldn’t breathe. He felt like the world was ending and it was his fault **(he could've tried harder he could've been closer to him he could've done something he could've done _anything_ but he _didn't_ and everything was _his fault_ )**. He didn’t go to the infirmary the next day.

Will thought that he should talk to someone about how he was feeling. But he didn’t.

\---

Will was twelve years old when he stopped feeling whole. He didn’t notice.

\---

Will was thirteen years old when his world came crashing down around him and rebuilt itself in obsidian and hypersthene and gold.

Charles Beckendorf was dead. The news hit the camp like a ton of bricks. Everyone seemed shell shocked. Michael walked around the infirmary in a daze, giving patients cups of water or their daily medications. He was doing actions but he didn’t seem to be seeing himself doing them. Will remembered seeing something similar a year earlier. Michael was heartbroken. Will silently wondered if he was the only one at camp with a preference for boys, but he quickly put his thoughts aside and quietly pulled Michael into the next room and wrapped his arms around the older boy. Michael was slow to return the hug but when he did, he pressed his face into Will's shoulder and _sobbed_. He gripped Will’s shirt and cried for a good ten minutes. When he was done, he looked Will in the eyes and the normally bright blue orbs were dark and broken. Will told him he was sorry and squeezed his shoulders. Michael gave him a shattered smile and went back to the infirmary.

Everything went even worse after that. The camp went to Manhattan for the war. Without the Ares cabin. Will didn't remember much of it. He remembered the bridge collapsing and Michael being lost **(no no he couldn't be lost he was the only thing Will had left he didn't know how he'd survive no no n o he didn't know how to lead his cabin he didn't k now how to do _a n  ything_ )** and Percy Jackson grabbing his arm and hauling him to a hotel by Central park to heal his girlfriend and he remembered being exhausted.

The war only got worse. Will saw his friends dying and he couldn't do anything to save them **(the funny thing about dead people is that you don't know they're dead until they are)** and he'd never felt more useless in his life **(that's a lie. He's useless and he knows it)**. His hands were shaking and he was so tired that most of the battle passed by in a blurry haze of fighting and blood and pain and death and Will hated it. The only thing he clearly remembered was standing on the top of a small building and seeing Nico di Angelo (his name had been whispered across camp since the previous summer) and seeing him surrounded by skeletons and death and then his father the great Hades himself came rolling down to stop next his son and Will could only focus on the thin boy with raven hair and a black sword. He was beautiful **(stunning, gorgeous, exquisite, magnificent, _divine_ )**. Will wondered if this is what love was.

The rest of the battle passed by in what seemed like seconds. Percy Jackson saved Olympus and denied godhood and Nico di Angelo looked happy for the first time since Will had first seen him and he wanted to do _anything_ to keep that boy smiling. When the demigods were back at camp and everything was sorted out and calmed, Nico di Angelo was always on Will's mind. Will finally got the courage to talk to the boy, when he learned that he'd left camp **(why hadn't he done it sooner he had every chance why why why he couldn't do anything right he was a disappointment he was ashamed of himself)**. Will felt something inside him crack.

Will could've tried to get help. To tame the agony in his soul. But he didn't.

\---

Will was thirteen years old when the most beautiful boy he'd ever seen disappeared without a trace. **(Thisisyourfuckingfaultyoupeiceofshityourfuckingfa _ultyourfuckingfault_ )** He couldn't stop hurting.

\---

Will was fifteen years old when he sees the boy of his dreams once again.

He, Lou Ellen, and Cecil were spying on the Romans when the son of Hades came striding towards them like he owned the world and for a second Will forgot how to breathe. Nico commented on his hair and their attire an **(stupid stupid stupid how could you be so fucking stupid why can't you ever think before you do things why do you always mess everything up)** d his eyes are glued on the teenager in front of him. He's sick. He's so so sick and Will wants to help him so badly that his entire body trembles with the need. He blames it on just birthing a child. He almost doesn't hear what Nico tells him and he hurries to oblige the wishes of the one who held his heart. Everything goes by so fast and all he can focus on is _Nico Nico Nico_ and then he's in Octavian's face and he's telling him off because this loser isn't a son of Apollo and he never will be. Octavion launches himself into the sky and collides with a metal dragon and the explosion is so bright that it made Will's eyes hurt. He demands for Nico to stay in the infirmary for three days **(you're so selfish why do you want this boy so badly he will never want you just let him move on you're so selfish you're so stupid you're so-)** and he's frustrated when Nico doesn't show up to see him **(why would he?)**.

Will stopped talking. His siblings didn't notice. No one did. When he sees Nico di Angelo talking to Jason Grace, he's furious. What did Grace have that he didn't? **(Literally everything Jason Grace is so much better than you and you'll never be anything else but a healer.)** Will tried to clear his mind but then Nico turned and saw him and he acted before thinking and then the boy was walking towards him and he looked slightly ashamed and nervous. Will confronted Nico about not coming to see him or to help out and Nico seemed utterly shocked by the idea of anyone liking him and Will wanted to _shake him_. Nico took a moment to tell something to Percy. The son of the Poseidon eyes turned confused and the daughter of Athena have him a high five. When the son of Hades turned back to Will, he was smiling. Will almost swooned.  **(Keep yourself together you fuck up you're not doing yourself any favors by being a schoolgirl)** Nico spent four days in the infirmary with Will and Will was on cloud nine without any intention of coming down.

Two weeks pass Nico di Angelo doesn't leave. He comes by to see Will at least once a day and he sometimes brings food with him. Will is grateful **(don't get used to it)** and he and Nico became fast friends **(why could he ever like someone like you)**. Nico comes by one day at his usual time and sits down in a chair next to Will, handing him a plate with a sandwich on it. Will inhaled it. But then does his stupid act-before-thinking bit and he puts his hand on Nico's neck and pulled his face in and kissed him. Nico froze up against him and Will panicked. He stuttered out apologies and clenched his hands into fists and tried not to cry **(congratulations you stupid fucking idiot you managed to ruin the best friendship you have and now you're going to be alone again)** and then Nico surprises him by lunging forward and pressing their lips together again. He pushed his hands into Will's hair and Will was almost too surprised to react. But he does, and he cups Nico's face in his hands and tried not to smile too much.

Will thought that he should tell Nico about how he felt. But he didn't

 ---

Will was fifteen years old when his world came into the perfect light and the crack in him starts to close.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so short im so so sorry i lost inspiration after the first scenario and everything about this just kinda sucks but i hope you guys like it!

Will Solace was nineteen years old when he finally realised that he was in love.

It was Nico di Angelo's 18th birthday and Will wanted to make the boys descent into adulthood something he would remember for the rest of his life. He saved his money for over four months and got them a reservation at one of the nicest Italian restaurants in Manhattan and gotten them a suite at the Plaza Hotel. Will had gotten him a deluxe pack of Mythomagic cards and because he’d recently become enamored with history, several twelve disk sets on the history of Europe and Asia. He’d arranged with Chiron to let them spent the day away from camp weeks in advance **(why do you need to make a big deal out of this it’s not like he’ll want you around much longer)** and he’d borrowed a suit from the Aphrodite kids. He’d been assured by Jason, Piper, Percy, Hazel, and Annabeth that Nico would love it but still the big part of him that was generalized anxiety worried nonstop and made his stomach coil and writhe.

When January 28th arrived, Will was seized with panic. He ran around his cabin in a frenzy, making sure everything was where he needed it to be and he checked with Piper at least twelve times before she charmspeaked him to calm down. Jason was as supportive as possible and he patted Will’s shoulder before telling him that he’d do great. The camp had wanted to throw Nico a small party for lunch. Hazel, Frank, Reyna, Percy, and Annabeth came all the way from Camp Jupiter to be there for him (you wish you could have friends like his. Yours forgot your birthday and didn’t even apologise for it). The party took place in the dining pavilion and Will was specifically instructed to cover Nico’s eyes and lead him there. Will said he could do _more_ than that and grinned at the fake gagging that came from Leo and the snort that came from Piper.

At noon, the time came for Nico to be in the dining pavilion. Will set out to find him but he found Will instead. Shadows emerged from around the area and swirled around Will’s feet. They tugged on his shirt and pants and shoestrings and directed him to the Hades cabin. Once he was inside, the door slammed shut and Nico pounced on him, pushing him against the door and kissing him until they were both breathless. As much as Will wanted to stay with him alone, they had a place to be **(people are probably talking they’re probably calling you names they’re _talking about you_ t alking abo-)** and Will reluctantly guided Nico outside before swinging him up into his arms and telling the younger boy to cover his eyes. He carried Nico bridal style to the pavilion and set him down facing his smiling friends and pulled his hand away from his eyes. When everyone cheered “Happy birthday!” Nico lurched backwards in shock and his back bumped against Will's chest. Will put his hands on Nico’s shoulders and urged him forward. The whole occurrence was full of smiles and laughter and Nico looked so happy and his smile made Will feel like he was flying **(you don’t make him happy he’s going to realize that he has better options and leave you and you’ll always be alone)**. Nico was so beautiful.

When the party was over, Nico was pulled away by Piper to the Aphrodite cabin to get ready for later. Will went back to his cabin and changed his clothes slowly, lost in thought. By the time three o'clock rolled around, Will was laying in his bunk, staring at the one above his completely spaced out. He was almost to the point of dozing off when Jason burst into the cabin, grabbed his arm, and dragged him to stand in front of the Aphrodite cabin. Two seconds later, Nico was opening the door and stepping out and Wills breathing stopped along with his heart because his boyfriend was stunning **(he’s too good for you you’re garbage you don’t deserve him he’s too pure and you’re an _a b omi nation_ why does he even like you he could do _so much better_ )**. They both smile at each other and Nico came down the steps to stop in front of Will and look at him. His eyes glowed with happiness and love and Will thought he would explode. The dinner was fantastic and they stayed at the restaurant for hours afterwards just talking and it was well after nine p.m. when they left.

They got to the Plaza Hotel at ten o’clock and when they got to the room, Nico took no time to stop before he was pulling off their clothes and pushing Will to the bed. The affair was full of gasps and moans and bliss. Nico left marks on Will’s neck and collar and chest that were happily returned and this boy made him see _stars_ and feel more than he’d felt before. Their lips met sloppily and with harsh breaths and heat boiled in their stomachs. When they both came, the room erupted in sunlight and shadows. Sunlight exploded away from Will’s body and danced around the room while the shadows rushed to him and coiled around his body. They whispered his name and Will thought he _must_ be dead because he couldn’t tell where his body ended and Nico’s began and his nails dug into the latter's shoulders while they clung to each other **(you don't know why this was happening why is he making you so happy why this has never happened before _wh y_ )** and panted for air. Nico collapsed on Will’s chest and Will combed his fingers through Nico’s hair and kissed the top of his head. They make love twice more that night and he was so so lucky to have this perfect angel.

Will supposed he could have worried about when Nico would leave him. But he didn’t.

\---

Will Solace was nineteen years old when he told his angel about his demons and they both cried.

\---

Will Solace was twenty-five years old when a crack forced its way back into his heart, and this time, it wouldn't leave him.

Will was working the night shift at the hospital. He'd been trying to get in extra hours to accumulate more time in leave so he could take Nico on a nice trip to Italy for their tenth anniversary. He'd just finished his rounds and was about to clock out when a patient in pretty bad shape showed up in the pit. Will figured he was the closest to the ER so he rushed over to help. When he arrived, one of many nurses briefed him on the situation. They guy had pushed a kid out of the way of an oncoming car only to get hit himself. He'd gone over the hood and broken the driver's windshield. He hadn't rolled off the car, was bleeding profusely, and was unconscious on arrival of paramedics. He went into the patient's stall with a small parade of nurses in tow, pulled the curtain closed, and turned to look at his patient. He felt like he'd been hit by a truck. **(No no n o iT caN' t Be him no n o N   O NON _ONO  PLe a_ s e  p l ease N O I T cAn't it cAN'T YOu n eed him you need him no no n _o no no no_ )** One of the nurses put her hand on Will’s arm, asking if he was ok, and he collapsed. His heart was loud in his ears **(TOO LOUD)** his chest was tight and he couldn't breathe couldn't breathe couldn't breathe the room rolled **(help me)** in his vision it was too bright and his stomach heaved **(help me)**. Several nurses tried to get Will up, to get him away from Nico's side, but he gripped the bar on the side of the bed **(help me help me help me help me hel-)** and was vaguely aware that he was chanting "no no no" and pushing back the friends trying to help him **(please)**.

After Will had calmed down, he was lead out by a nurse and put in a chair with a cup of water and sad smile. About an hour and a half later, one of his coworkers appeared in front of him and all Will could do was stare at him with empty eyes. **(He’ll be ok he has to be he has to be _he has to be_ )** He gave Will a rundown of Nico's injuries and Will sighed when it was only four broken ribs, scrapes, bruises, and a concussion. He thanked the doctor more times than he could count before asking if he could see his husband. He said that because Will worked there, he could. Will gave him a shaky yet grateful smile before rushing back to his angels side. Will thanked every god he could name off the top of his head when he slipped through the curtains and Nico was awake.  Nico reached out for him and flinched when his IV jerked under his skin. Will chastised him, told him not to do too much reaching or else he’d pull something out and that was always a hassle.

Will still hugged him and kissed every inch of his face **(he’s perfect and he’s ok this is the best thing to ever happen to you)** and pressed his face into his neck and thanked the gods he was alive. Nico brushed his fingers through Will’s hair and mumbled apologies into Will’s shoulder and hugged him so tightly it probably was making his broken ribs ache. Will pulled back, held Nico’s face in his hands and interrogated him for twenty minutes before he kissed him senseless, and said he was going to call Hazel and the others. After making five incredibly stressful phone calls, he was back at Nico’s side. They talked about nothing for half an hour before friends and family started arriving.

Hazel and Frank were the first to get there. Hazel threw herself on her brother and cried on his shoulder and then she hugged Will within an inch of his life and she thanked him over one hundred times. Frank was as awkward as always but he expressed gratitude towards Will and patted Nico on the shoulder, saying he was glad he was ok. Jason, Piper, Percy, and Annabeth arrived all at once in a flurry of flowers and get well cards. Percy hugged Nico so hard that the smaller man was holding back tears of pain and Will delicately announced that Nico had broken ribs and Percy dropped him like a sack of potatoes apologizing five times a second but Nico laughed it off and said it was ok. Jason lifted Nico off the bed when he hugged him and only put him down when Will threatened to kick him out for manhandling his patient. Piper and Annabeth were much more gentle in their hugs and then Reyna arrived followed by Leo and Calypso.

Will gave them the special privilege of staying past visiting hours but he made everyone promise to be as quiet as possible. They talked for hours and ended the night on Annabeth announcing that she was expecting. Everyone congratulated them and they all filed out at about two in the morning. Will was so absolutely grateful that his everything was safe. He didn't leave Nico's side for almost two days. Eventually, the weeks passed and Nico made a full recovery.

Will could have focused on how close Nico came to dying. He could have focused on the bad things. But he didn't.

\---

Will Solace was twenty five years old when his heart and soul almost died. It left a wound that never did heal.

\---

Will Solace was thirty years old and he was surrounded by friends and family who love him and he held his world in his arms and for the first time in his life, he didn’t worry about a thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls comment and tell me what you thought!! this is my favorite style of writing and i really try to center it around what the characters are feeling more than what they're doing.  
> tbh im thinking about writing a nsfw fic about these two do u guys think i should do it


	3. Chapter 3

So this isn't an actual update, but I'm considering making this a series. Like just little oneshots of Will and Nico being domestic cuties and I might write a longer story if I get the inspiration to do so. But anyway, the main reason I'm making this update is for some feedback! A lot of people have read this and I'd like to know if you think I should continue writing about these two in this AU. Please let me know what you think! And suggestions are always welcome! Thanks guys!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Visit my blog toooooooo: pageofmemes.tumblr.com

**Author's Note:**

> ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ


End file.
